trouble at the superstore
On my way to work this morning I stopped at the local Morrisons supermarket to pick up some stuff for the day. It was sufficiently early that the Specsavers Opticians franchise in the entrance lobby was closed.
The shop was mainly populated by online shoppers, the self-checkouts deserted. I served myself in record time & got back to the car. As I was proceeding in an orderly fashion down the carpark some headphone-clad young lad stepped out in front of my car, not even looking up from his phone. I braked hard and he looked up.
I gave him the universal hand gesture for "What the actual fuck are you doing?"
He gave me the universal hand gesture for "What the actual fuck are you doing?" back.
Aggrieved and somewhat vexed, I wound my window down and shouted "Specsavers is *that way!" - pointing to the entrance of Morrisons, alluding to the fact that in stepping into incoming traffic his vision must be so bad he needed a visit to the opticians.
He did a "come at me bro" pose and angrily started mouthing off.
I pointed again, shouted "SPECSAVERS" and drove off.
At that moment I saw myself. An old, angry, white beard in a 15 year old car, yelling at some stupid kid who nearly got himself run over.
Nobody came away from that exchange looking good.