ai no corridor
The company I work for has gone all in on AI (artificial intelligence). We're meant to be using AI all the time in our workflows, creating emails, summarising emails, summarising meetings, summarising chat messages etc. etc.
The company I work for is also massively invested in acronym usage. KPI (key performance indicators) ROI (return on investment) B2B (business to business) WTFAYBOAYUA (what the fuck are you banging on about, you useless arsehole?); y'know, all the internationally recognised business acronyms that we all love. However, they also absolutely love creating their own acronyms.
So new projects spawn replete with their own custom acronyms that fail to explain what they're naming and meetings are full of people stroking their chins and nodding their heads, pretending to understand.
"So we've synergised the metrics across PHG, brought the SFS under the DFS umbrella and are monitoring the XJ output with CCG compliant KLFs"
"Does that work with WQZ?"
"WQZ requires a CXG overlay that UX will implement once AFS and SFS are combined using TKS for deployment to DFS."
That's how meetings and presentations sound, just modem noises for management software.
Anyway, the AI guru at the office is now encouraging us all to use his new tool that he vibe coded in AI that decodes acronyms on the fly during Zoom/Teams meetings. Just start it up when you join a meeting and it translates all the acronyms into human words.
Here's a suggestion: In order to save the planet from data centres sucking away all its resources in order to translate acronyms on the fly, how's about WE ALL JUST FLIPPIN WELL TALK IN ENGLISH SO EVERYONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT YOU'RE GOING ON ABOUT?